It's Gonna Be Special (I Hope!)

SOLITUDE
Ok. So I got out of mom's house today at the very last minute. Went to the drugstore! Yeah, that's the excitement for me here in The Middle Of Nowhere where eveything closes at 10 or midnight. I just had to get out though. My life is so so closed-in, in recent years, and since I have been at mom's for 2 to 3 weeks, except for her, the solitude has been even greater. I am trapped at home, trapped by aloneness. At mom's I am trapped by the restraints of her own lifestyle and odd, nagging, but well-intentioned ways.

NO MATTER WHAT?
No matter what I do, it seems I am stuck with being alone, with not finding friends at all. Today, I will admit is another low mood day. Yet these low moods combined with life's ever-changing daily circumstances can add up to me feeling that I am left with a totally HOPELESS future. Which would be easier to accept if of course I had not started off i life with such a promising one ...